We are almost done with part 1 of our application and as we are writing our responses I thought I would share a few because they are questions we are often asked by others when we say that we are adopting from Ethiopia
What is your motivation and reasons for wanting to build your family through adoption? Oh where to begin! Adoption is something we both have always known was important and something we would do one day. We wanted to have a biological child to experience pregnancy and all that comes with bringing a new life into this world but knew that afterward we would look into adoption. We both have big hearts for children and believe that all children deserve a chance at a good life with a family who can love them unconditionally and provide for them to give them everything they need and deserve. As much as we love our own child and understand why people want to have their own, biological children, it is also hard not to realize the need that exists in providing for children who are already born and may go without knowing what a loving family is. We very much want to teach our own son to love others and realize that we are here on this earth to unselfishly help where there is need. We are excited to see our family grow and watch our son become a big brother but more than anything we are excited to show an innocent child the love that they deserve and know that they are safe and will be cared for, for the rest of their life.
How do you anticipate this adoption affecting your child? We don’t have any negative thoughts about how this adoption will affect Jalen other than how any child may be affected by the addition of a new brother or sister. Jalen is an only child right now but he does go to daycare and loves being there because he loves being around and playing with other children so we anticipate him being excited to have a lifetime playmate. We plan to begin preparing Jalen for his future brother or sister as he is getting to the age where he is starting to understand a little more and think it will be a good idea to prepare him for the new arrival just as a family would when a mom becomes pregnant and prepares to have another child.
How comfortable are you with unknowns regarding the child’s background, history and potential undiagnosed medical and/or emotional problems? We feel that one can never know what a child’s future holds medically, emotionally and in all aspects of life whether they come into this world biologically related to us or not. As a physical therapist, I (Joely) have worked with many children with various medical and emotional conditions and have come to realize that there is never going to be a guarantee that any child will be “typical” and without medical or emotional problems. From a personal standpoint, Jason was adopted as a baby with his parents taking him in not knowing his background, history or potentially undiagnosed conditions. All in all, we can honestly say that we feel quite comfortable with the unknowns that will come with our future child.
Some of those questions are so hard to answer! Especially when asked why you want to adopt, it was hard for us to talk about without sounding like we wanted to "rescue" a child.
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